As I was sitting in my bed this morning wanting to lay there forever because I just didn't want to feel strong today, God said "let nothing separate me from you today." I laid my sadness, my fears, my weakness, and everything that was not enough on the table before Him. I tugged on to them trying to keep them and have an excuse to feel weak, but God was asking me for an undivided heart. I knew if I was going to give this day to Him, I needed to have a pure heart only desiring the things that God had for me.
To be honest, this is what every morning has looked like over the past week. I have to make the conscious decision each morning to put my life in His hands for His purposes. I consciously give the selfish Emily away so that others will see Our Maker and not me. By doing this I got to see 13 year old Elian preach for the first time, I got to have a conversation with 17 year old Valeri about choosing faith for herself, I get to see 14 year old James from Haiti sing his heart out to God, I got to lead two people in the salvation prayer in Spanish, I got to hear 6 year old Wood tell me that God knows everything, and countless other moments that I am storing up in my heart!
So just know that when you ask me how I am doing, I am homesick, dirt-covered, and my hair is just awful, but I see why God is asking all or nothing. God continues to remind me that there is beauty beyond measure in obedience to Him. And tomorrow when I wake up, without a doubt, I will choose it all over again.
Xoxo,